Beers of the World – Spain – Vol. 1 (Tyris)

Prior to arriving in Spain, I assumed that the majority of my drinking would be focused on wine and sangria.  The wine prediction definitely came true.  It’s awesome.  The sangria, however, is not what I expected.  It’s usually only made at family outings and isn’t available in restaurants/bars like I had hoped.  The stuff they serve at bars is out of a tap or a bottle.  Fail.  So, beer is back in the game!  Unfortunately, most of the beers I’ve tasted are crappy pilsner-types with no defining characteristics (there seems to be a theme developing here) and lame branding.  But I’ll keep drinking them and writing about them because that’s what a good writer does.  He drinks.  And I suppose he should write some too.

 Tyris

I have tried more than a dozen Spanish beers in the 3 weeks that I’ve been in Spain.  So why have I waited 3 weeks to write about them?

1) I’m acclimating to Spanish culture and the siesta lifestyle…it’s more tiring than you’d think, considering you nap almost daily.

2) Most of the beer I have tasted so far has sucked, so it’s hard to get motivated to write about it.  Plus, I need to be more creative when the beer sucks and that takes time.

C) I actually have a social life here. I’m not alone in volunteering. I’m not chilling in the jungle all day.  I’ve probably gone out more in the last 3 weeks with my new friends here than I did the last year at home in Pittsburgh.  Needless to say, Spain is pretty awesome.

But I digress, none of these are viable excuses for delaying my (few, albeit awesome) readers the immense joy of reading my ridiculous beer reviews.  That being said, my first Spanish beer review is of the best beer that I’ve had so far.  Our local volunteer coordinator (take note, kids: always ask the locals what’s good – they know) recommended Tyris to me when I told her I needed a beer with flavor.  Fortunately, she led me down the path of righteousness that is flanked by good taste.

The Basics

  • Country: Spain
  • Type: Blonde Ale
  • ABV: 5.0%

 The Bottle & Branding

Tyris made the best first impression of all the beers I’ve tasted in Spain to date.  She arrived at my table, which already had quite a few attractive ladies sitting at it (hooray, volunteering!), encased in that beautiful brown bottle I like so much.  Her label was a bit hipster-ish, but it just seemed to work.  She was pulling it off!  The orange and black on off-white is an attractive combo despite the Halloween-y vibe.  Bottom line, the beer looks good.

The Beer

Tyris

Tyris is the first good beer that I tried in Spain.  It’s unlike the other beers I’ve tasted…it has taste!  All of the other beers have been the equivalent of drinking cardboard on an overcast day while listening to emo music.  That shit is boring!  Tyris has a slightly sweet taste with a hint of fruitiness.  Don’t ask me what kind of fruit.  What do I look like?  A fruit maker?!?!  Just know that it tastes decent and you can feel mostly respectable drinking it.  You’re probably going to look a bit hipstery drinking it from the bottle because of the branding, but pour that sucker in a glass and nobody will know the difference.  BeerAndaBackpack Beer Rating Score: 6.5

 

The Beer And a Backpack Beer Rating Scale:

10: This stuff is made of unicorn smiles and the best song in the world.  There is nothing superior in any galaxy.

9: Did I just become Batman?  Because drinking this will LITERALLY make you Batman.

8: When you’re a kid and it’s Christmas morning and you actually get exactly what you want, that’s this beer.

7: I could drink a paycheck’s worth of these beauties and still not get a hangover.

6: It tastes pretty good.  I’d buy this beer for home consumption.

5: This is beer.  That’s it, it’s just beer.

4: Something isn’t quite right here.  Is somebody watching me?  Do I have lettuce in my teeth?

3: Awesome, yeah, I wanted to spend the next 12 hours with my face in a toilet reviewing the contents of my stomach.

2: This “beer” is the equivalent peeing your pants while giving an important work presentation and finding out your significant other is sleeping with your best friend…at the same time.

1: Falling into a nest of Bullet Ants would be preferable right now.

0: Kill me. Now.

 

Best For

Overcoming the unyielding assault of boring Spanish beers when you just can’t stomach another wine hangover.  If you’ve been drinking the same pilsner-type brews that I have for the last 3 weeks, you need something with a bit of flavor or your tongue is going to pack up and move to Belgium.  Think about that for a second.  Do you want to live a life without a tongue?  Your tongue will be in Belgium drinking amazing beers and eating frittes while you spend the rest of your days not being able to taste anything.  Don’t live a boring life, drink a beer with flavor every now and then.  And go to Belgium.  All the Belgians I talk to say they have the best beer in the world and that their frittes are amazing.

 

Regret Level

*Calculated out of 100% based on how bad I think I will feel after a night of drinking only this beer.

20% low level of regret

Tyris is a fairly light beer with a nice but not overpowering taste.  That results in a pretty easy night of drinking and nothing too serious in the hangover department the next day.  Just make sure you swing by your local late night spot and grab a bite to eat when you finish boozing.  Remember, keep your tongue happy.


Disclaimer: Don’t be stupid.  Follow all local laws and don’t act like a drunken idiot.  Drink responsibly!